TV: The Walking Dead SE3 EP2

The Walking Dead
Drama, Horror, Thriller

I'm just going to say from the outset that the only reason I'm actually writing about this episode is to show you how this show jumps around. Last ep, the first ep of the season, was freaking awesome! It had everything I wanted and expected. This episode was the complete opposite.

I've said this about this show a lot; too much dialogue and not enough freaking zombies! I'm going to tell you now, there will eventually be less zombies or they will start to become irrelevant... I know right? Disappointing! But don't worry, lots of other crap happens... in between all the talking about it.

So we met the prisoners. Rick (Andrew Lincoln) killed that one guy - who freakin' deserved it in my opinion. I was yelling at Rick to kill him before that but when Lori (Sarah Wayne Callies) was saying that Rick should kill them all I was telling her to STFU. Lori annoys the absolute crap out of me!

I was actually unsure about Hershel (Scott Wilson) dying or not, if you've read the comics you know what I'm talking about.  In the comic, the guy in this position is Alan and he didn't survive but then later Dale (Jeffrey DeMunn) lost part of his leg and survived. Yes the Dale who died  last season... he actually survived a nice long while in the comics and was one of the major characters... I was kind of upset when they killed him off actually. So really, Hershel could have swung either way and I was right there with everyone else telling Lori not give him mouth to mouth and for Carl (Chandler Riggs) to shoot him already!

Really disappointed in this episode. The promo above is lying when it shows you the Governor (David Morrissey), Michonne (Danai Gurira) and Andrea (Laurie Holden); they were not in this episode whatsoever! That's what I most want to see damnit!

1 out of 5 machetes... 

Movie: StreetDance 2 (2012)

StreetDance 2 (2012)
Drama, Music, Romance

This movie is so crap. I wish they'd just skipped the plot line altogether and just made it a documentary about dance, if they'd done that I might have actually liked it. I haven't seen the first one but I assume it's just as crap, the movies generally are.

Having said that, the dancing is amazing! Sofia Boutella has some damn fine legs! *fans self* I had to watch her original dance twice. The final dance was pretty awesome too and even though I hated this movie, I still found myself cheering along for the good guys to win.

The story is your usual one; Guy (Falk Hentschel) enters dance competition, loses badly and spends the rest of the film putting together a new team and trying a new style so he can go back and beat the guys who walloped him before. Of course everything goes to plan and he gets the girl in the end.

Very predicable. No recognizable actors but I'm assuming they are actually all dancers. not actors... and you can pretty much tell that fact when watching it. Don't bother unless you're really bored, I don't know why I did... and yet, I bet after I post this review I will go watch the first one...

1 out 5 flamingos....

Movie: Buried (2010)

Buried (2010)
Drama, Mystery, Thriller

It was brought to my attention the other day that I've reviewed too many good things lately. Gee whiz, sorry! Anyway, I'm rectifying that with this post. I'm going to label this film as 'Worst Film I've Ever Tried To Watch - Multiple Times'. That's right, I've tried to watch this movie three or four times now and I always switch it off before it gets even halfway through.

Terrible. If they budgeted more than my yearly salary on this film, I might have to cut a bitch. I could make this myself from my crappy little Nokia mobile phone and a closet. *eye roll*

Oh, except they probably paid Ryan Reynolds (Safe House, Green Lantern) some obscene amount of money to sit in a cramped little box for the entire filming. I'm going to blame his breakup with Scarlett Johansson for his pick of this film... not 'cos I hate ScarJo but 'cos we all know he must have been freakin' depressed to lose her hawtness! *drools*

I tried to watch it and fell asleep, tried to watch it while cooking and missed the entire thing, tried to watch it again out of determination.....didn't make it... I actually ended up asking a friend whether he ever got out of the box....

Spoiler Alert; no, he doesn't, he dies. Big fat boo! What a waste of time and money.

It's crap, don't even try watch it. I'd give it a zero if I were half as mean as I make myself out to be.... but I'm not, so....

1 extremely depressed piece of poo...

Movie: Battleship (2012)

Battleship (2012)
Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

This film should be called Battlesh#t, worst excuse for a movie ever! I heard that it was made semi in the image of ye ol' game of Battleship. Ie. You've sunk my Battleship (Can I get an award for saying Battleship a billion times in one post?)

There was a huge hoo-ha made about this film, I don't know why... maybe it's because it's Rihanna's (yes the singer...) first attempt at acting and boy was she terrible! Every time she came on screen I morphed into Chris Brown (another singer who tried to be an actor) and wanted to slap her silly. What is she doing? She falls so flat every time she says anything. I might just avoid every film she's in after this. Stick to singing RiRi!


I did get a little excited when I realised Alexander Skarsgard (True Blood) was in it! But then his Battleship got sunk and he was gone before the movie was halfway through! Pooey! God knows what they did for the other half of the film but it bored me silly!

And Taylor Kitsch.... I loved him in John Carter... this, not so much. Boring!

If you really want to watch it, just watch the last 10 minutes or so, that's the best bit...

1 out 5 sunken Battleships...