TV: Hemlock Grove SE1

Hemlock Grove
Horror, Mystery, Thriller

I started watching this show because I heard that season 2 was coming, it's a Netflix so seasons come out all in one go (love that!) and because I'd run out of decent shows to watch... if you have any suggestions, let me know! I'll be reviewing anime soon... ha!

Anyway, this show confused the hell out of me at first. I kept thinking I was missing things but I'm pretty sure that's just the way the show is. I'd heard a few whispers about werewolves and vampires but I didn't see any for the first few episodes and thought I must have heard wrong... then I saw the above clip... WOW! I literally stood up and cheered. I am so glad they did the werewolf thing right. No cheese, all gross: fantastic! I spent the rest of the season waiting to see the change again.

I love that they've used Gypsies instead of witches, witches are so overdone. In fact, the way this is written, scripted and filmed is done so well that none of the supernatural elements are lame, as we see in most shows of the same genre. Add in Famke Janssen (Jean Grey from X-Men), Bill Skarsgard (Alexander Skarsgard's little brother), Landon Liboiron (Terra Nova, Degrassi) and Lili Taylor (Almost Human, High Fidelity), a mostly unknown yet surprisingly fantastic cast, and we have a pretty darn awesome show!

I especially love the tense bromance between Peter (Liboiron) and Roman (Skarsgard). I wasn't sure whether they were going to rip each other apart or tear each others' clothes off... please go with second one! I'm also enjoying the Gypsy lore featuring Peter's cousin Destiny (Kaniehtiio Horn), the whole mystery of who/what/where Roman's sister Shelley (Nicole Boivin) came from, and what exactly is Roman supposed to be!?

I figured out who the killer was in the first few episodes but that main plotline wasn't what kept me watching... and I kept changing my mind back and forth. This show is full of mysteries! Stay tuned for season 2 review...

4 out of 5 werewolves...

TV: The Strain SE1 EP1

The Strain
Drama, Horror, Sci Fi

I spoke a little about this in my mass post of upcoming new shows and it's finally here! A friend recommended me the book by director Guillermo del Toro who's dark, spooky style is well known from Pan's Labyrinth. I'm glad I read it before the show came out...at least I was semi prepared for the creepy factor.

It starts with something we've seen in these kind of shows before: a dead airplane. There is a mixture of traditional vampire mythology: the coffin of dirt, being transported over water, what I think is a Master, etc. But it's just a tad different. I might be giving some of it away here but I'm assuming most of you will figure all this out in the first couple of episodes. There are vampires... but they're not the sexy, fang sporting vampires we are used to. These vampires are infected with a parasite and they feed via these really ugly looking stingers. Very cool, very spooky.

I recognised Corey Stoll right away even though with the hair he looks a little different from his House of Cards role. Mia Maestro (Alias, Twilight: Breaking Dawn) was also hard to miss, she's showing up everywhere lately. They play the two leading CDC investigators who got more than they planned for with the dead airplane. David Bradley (Filch from Harry Potter) plays a kooky old dude who's apparently dealt with these monsters before.

The first episode has not disappointed so far: it's sufficiently spooky and mysterious. Even having read the book I'm still interested in watching the show, which is a good sign. It's set to get even creepier so give it a go and let me know what you think.

4 out of 5 parasites...

TV: American Horror Story SE3 EP13

American Horror Story

Drama, Fantasy, Horror

Ok, I've heard good and bad things about this finale and I have to agree with both. The Stevie Nicks music video at the very beginning of this episode is overkill. She's already had a feature in an entire episode, stop being so greedy! Yeah, yeah, she's like massively famous and rumored to be a witch so it's kinda smart I suppose but like I said, one episode is enough Stevie. Plus, that lip syncing was terrible!

This season - Coven - started off really slowly, I was actually very disappointed at first but it's really picked up in the last few episodes. I was so excited when I saw Kathy Bates (Misery, Fried Green Tomatoes) was guest starring in this season, that was huge! And what a character she played, fantastic. I hope she will be in next season too.

Poor Misty Day (Lily Rabe), what a sweet girl and I did so hope for her to be the new Supreme. I did not expect her to die that's for sure... actually I'm surprised at how many of them did die this episode. Once Misty was out of the running I thought for sure that Zoe (Taissa Farmiga) would be the Supreme... then she died too. Just when we thought that Madison (Emma Roberts) - the bitch - was going to be the Supreme. Thank goodness she wasn't! I'm not surprised that Kyle (Evan Peters) killed her, I wanted to strangle her too. Cow. 

I'm not at all surprised that the Supreme turned out to be Cordelia (Sarah Paulson), or that Fiona (Jessica Lange) was still alive. I knew that when Cordelia saw the vision of the Axeman (Danny Huston) killing Fiona that it wasn't quite right. Then when they were hugging I thought for sure Fiona would stab Cordelia in the back... oh well, I suppose it had to end somehow.

I was totally surprised about Myrtle (Frances Conroy) burning at the stake - again! I thought for sure after half the coven had been killed that she would stick around just to make up the numbers. But of course she was right and Cordelia had already put the word out about the coven, so more witches would be joining soon. Still, who would volunteer for that?!

Three seasons and I think season two - Asylum - is my favorite so far. We've had murders and ghosts, crazy people and more ghosts, and finally witches and voodoo; what will be next do you think? I love how this show changes every season and recycles most of it's cast. It's good to see that they can actually act and continue to convince us of their characters each season.

4 out of 5 cauldrons...

Honorary mention to Denis O'Hare as the help, the demented butler, Spalding. I didn't recognize him!

TV: The Walking Dead SE4 EP8

The Walking Dead
Drama, Horror, Thriller

I had to write a post on this (even though I had other plans for today's post...) for a few reasons. I've been starting to hear complaints about this show, finally! I've been saying for a while that it's too much talk and not enough zombies, even though I've read the comics and they are almost following the same story line. All the talking is just so boring! After last week's episode I heard quite a bit more whinging... "Isn't this how last season ended?" Well, yeah.

I actually had a little bit of hope for The Governor (David Morrissey) when he found that family. Though when he killed Martinez (Jose Pablo Cantillo) I thought he might go even crazier and take out everyone but the little girl. Nope, instead he goes back to the same old stuff he was up to before and rallies the new camp behind him to take out the prison. I tried so hard not to spoiler this for people who haven't read the comics... but as soon as I saw that tank, I knew it was going over the fence.

This is actually a pretty major part in the comics because this is where Rick (Andrew Lincoln) and Carl (Chandler Riggs) lose Lori and Judy (I say lose because you never actually see them die...). Of course Lori is already gone... and now so is Judy. I'm actually surprised they didn't lose more people. Hershel (Scott Wilson) was gone as soon as The Gov caught him but I am surprised he didn't kill Michonne (Danai Gurira) first. Hershel couldn't run off and The Gov did have a vendetta against her. Silly.

I've been saying for a while now that it's not about the zombies anymore; they've almost figured out a way to deal with them so that they aren't a problem. It's all about the people now, the survivors and what they will do in order to continue living. But the repeat of The Governor is silly. I hope this is the last we see of him... though I will tell you there will be others like him further down the line.

My wildcard, Daryl (Norman Reedus) is still going. Maggie (Lauren Cohan) and Glenn (Steven Yeun) have been split up. Carl and Rick are on foot. Tyreese (Chad L. Coleman) will never die! Fences are down, prison is destroyed, they are all back on the road again! Will they run into Carol (Melissa McBride) do you think? I have a feeling it wasn't her that killed those people, I think she is covering for one of the girls. Hopefully the rest of this season will be a bit more exciting.

2 out of 5 eye patches...

PS. Mid-Season Finales AGAIN! Ugh!

TV: Lost Girl SE4 EP1

Lost Girl
Crime, Fantasy, Horror

I am so excited about this show being back! It is one of my favourite shows, very cool. Most of the cast are on Twitter and they were live tweeting this premier tonight. I was watching and they did really well not to spoiler it for me! It really does make it just that little bit more exciting to watch now! Argh!

Ok, firstly, I thought I was going crazy when Kenzi (Ksenia Solo from Black Swan) and Dyson (Kris Holden-Ried from The Tudors) kissed! What the hell? Then I slowly started to realise it was like Kenzi was Bo... Then I actually looked up a season 3 recap (scroll to the very bottom for a one paragraph recap, lol) 'cos I thought I'd really missed something... I didn't, this is just the writers' crazy idea of a season premier.

Alright, so last I remember Tamsin (Rachel Skarsten who was in a couple of The LA Complex episodes. Love that show, sad it's been canned. You can see my reviews for it here) and Bo (Anna Silk) were on a mission to rescue everyone from that experimental facility. Lauren (Zoie Palmer) was forced to extract Dyson's DNA from his bone marrow and give it to the crazy scientist guy to make him a Fae. She gave him a different Fae's DNA and Dyson kicked his ass cos he's awesome like that! Everyone got rescued somehow (of course), including Aife (Inga Cadranel who's in Orphan Black which I have yet to review but it's awesome!), Bo's crazy ass mother. Bo finally meets The Wanderer though he is being really secretive still. He kidnaps her and locks her in a Tarot Card? Kayyy.

Now it's been a while so this could be obvious or I could have my shows crossed over... but is anyone else thinking The Wanderer is Bo's father? I forgot that Tamsin was dying as well, maybe that's why we didn't actually see her in this episode? Is she going to be okay? We better see her again, I like her! Did The Wanderer wipe all their memories? I'm guessing so...

The two meeting scenes of Trick (Richard Howland) and Aife were good. All sweet then all evil, loved it. Poor crazy Aife, I feel a little sorry for her sometimes... Massimo (hello Tim Rozon!) has got Kenzi all addicted to Fae juice, but what happened to Bruce (Rob Archer also plays the Bioman in Defiance)? I really liked him, he better be in some of this season! Didn't Kenzi and Hale (K.C. Collins) pash there somewhere too? Only been waiting like 2 seasons for that to happen! Vex (Paul Amos)! I think everyone hates to love Vex... but him being The Morrigan? Riiiiiight... What the hell was up with his outfits this episode? Even further out there than normal.

Honorable mentions to Kenzi, Hale and Dyson's very hot dance routine. Anyone would think Ksenia has done that before, ha! Hale's bad ass fight with Vex! What about the wish granter played by George Takei (uhh, Star Trek!)? And finally, a tiny appearance by Mia Kirshner from Defiance as a nymph. Love it!

Ok, so where is Bo? Will Aife kill Trick, and didn't Trick escape to somewhere in the last ep last season? Is Lauren going to come back? Where is Tamsin? Is any of this episode real or are they in like a dreamscape thing? And what is this Una Mens? Tell me what you think! I am soooo excited still!

4 out of 5 Tarot Cards...

Kenzi's one liners are still the best! This eps highlight:

"You need to be delivered to a dentist buddy, your breath smells like the anus of a yeti."

Movie: The Chernobyl Diaries (2012)

The Chernobyl Diaries (2012)
Horror

I cannot think why I watched this except that I was on a very long plane ride and had a severe hankering for horror / thriller movies at the time... so much so that I watched every horror / thriller being offered on my flight - which was quite a few. This one stuck in my head though not for any good reason.

It's very Blair Witch - yes, we still liken these styles of films to this old '99 flick - in that there is a lot of hand-held camera shots, very shaky and very much vlog style. It's not the filming, or even the thriller part that caught my attention, it was Chernobyl itself and the rumours and myths surrounding it now.

The film is about a group of tourists who go on an Extreme Tourism day trip to the town of Pripyat, not too far from Chernobyl itself. Now we all know what happened there, right? Nuclear reactor four exploded and the surrounding areas - including Pripyat - had to be evacuated immediately... that's about 350,000 people, so there's still lots of stuff there. As much as this film is entirely fiction, the radiation levels have in fact dropped enough to allow people to visit Pripyat for short periods of time. If you want to see what it looks like now take a look at these 25 Years Later Photos by David Schindler. Looking through the photos makes me wonder if they did any filming on location. That would be difficult right? but if it's not on location they did a good job on the sets! Especially the Ferris Wheel.

Its a B-grade cast, of course, with the only recognisable name being Jesse McCartney and who is probably not someone a lot of people will know from looking at him as most of his work is voice work. The rest of the cast are uninteresting as actors and characters. The whole film had a gotchya feel to it; I kept expecting Uri to jump out when the last two were running around screaming yelling "Ah ha! Extreme Tourism! BAM!" and for it to have all been set up to scare them into being good little kiddies. Needless to say, it didn't end that way.

I liked that it's something that could actually exist, they are always the scariest thrillers. I jumped once, maybe twice so not that spooky. I wanted to get a closer look at the mutants! Wouldn't bother unless you're like me and ever so slightly intrigued by the idea of this story.

2 out of 5 mutant fish...

TV: The Walking Dead SE3 EP7

The Walking Dead
Drama, Horror, Thriller

I think they've mixed the characters around a little from the comics. Instead of Michonne (Danai Gurira) and Glenn (Steven Yeun) being stuck in Woodbury, it's Glen and Maggie (Lauren Cohan). I wonder if that means that Maggie will end up going through the same thing as what happened in the comics, but instead of it being the Governor (David Morrissey) doing the bad, it'll be Merle (Michael Rooker)...

At least that's what I thought until the Governor volunteered to question her...I knew that guy was a piece of work. I hope to God Andrea (Laurie Holden) finds out all about his sadistic crap and the fact that her friends are being held prisoner. I hope it's Andrea who gives him what he gets in the comics... I hope he gets every last piece of it too. *flips bird*

Michonne finally made it to the Prison. At least she told them what happened to Glen and Maggie. We knew Daryl (Norman Reedus) had to go... but what's that going to mean when he runs into his brother? His and Rick's (Andrew Lincoln) little moment in the woods was lovely but will that be enough to keep him on the side of his group or his brothers? There's no way Merle will chose to side with Rick, I didn't even consider that a possibility.

Wow, Glenn smashed that zombie! He's always seemed like such a soft character even though he has this survival instinct that works for him, but that was just savage. Go Glenn! Now they know about the Prison though... Then again, the Gov is right, that group is a special group. They've lasted for a long time both on the road and stationary, they cleared that Prison themselves, maybe they can take Woodbury too?

The plot thickens...

3 out of 5 cups half full/empty...

PS. MID SEASON FINALE?!? What the hell! Has it become a new trend to split seasons in half now? Screw you guys! ...Oh yeah, Christmas, ha!

TV: American Horror Story SE2 EP5

American Horror Story
Drama, Horror, Mystery

This is one of my favourite shows on at the moment. I love a good horror/thriller and I've been trying to figure this season out. I know from last season that this episode was where everything changed for me and I think it will be the same with this season too. This episode definitely revealed a few things that I was wondering about.

I supposed I'll start by talking about Anne Frank (Franka Potente; you might recognise her from Run Lola Run!) and how I actually believed she was Anne Frank... she was very convincing. Then once the reveal came that she really was insane, I was thinking that she might still have seen Dr. Arden (James Cromwell) somewhere... and I was right! Just because she was a bit kooky didn't mean she hadn't seen him while she was researching Anne Frank and Nazis, the rest very well might be made up but she did recognise Arden! I thought her being lobotomised would kill her and it's just a little freaky that she's gone all Stepford Wife now.

Speaking of Arden and his crazy surgical adventures... how about what he did to the sex crazed Shelley (Chloe Sevigny from American Psycho)? I knew right away that the demon possessed Sister Eunice (Lily Rabe) had cleaned up after him... yeah, remember the demon possession? I have a feeling that's going to be terribly important to the rest of this season. What I want to know is why Eunice dumped what was left of Shelley near a school? I was highly amused at all the screaming and running though.

So Dr. Thredson (Zachary Quinto) is the real Bloody Face and he's taken Lana (Sarah Paulson) and no one knows she's even there... I never saw this coming, I thought he was honestly trying to help Lana. Is he even a real doctor? He did seem like he knew what he was talking about when he diagnosed Anne...

But what about Kit (Evan Peters)? When they were doing the recording I actually did think what a terrible idea it was and low and behold it was used against him as his confession. So now he gets the electric chair right? But Grace (Lizzie Brochere) saw Alma (Britne Oldford) alive! What the? I'm so confused. If Bloody Face AKA Thredson set Kit up, then who was the headless body if it wasn't Alma? and where is she now? Pregnant as well. Is it really aliens or has Bloody Face jacked them up on drugs to make them see things while he has his way with them? and if that's the case then how did he get to Grace and why wasn't she killed?

Finally; Sister Jude (Jessica Lange) has lost the plot and taken off. But she was right about Arden! I hope the guy she hired to find out more about him, actually does find out the truth. Wonder what's going to happen to Jude now...

4 out of 5 chomping teeth...